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Posts Tagged ‘unexpected’

There is a war going on
Can’t anyone see???
A battle between heart and mind
The war within me
At first I denied it
“Are you pregnant? When are you due?”
I refused to admit, even to myself
That what they were saying COULD be true
I forgot about what’s-his-name
That cold March night
How I let him come over
Just because I was tired of the fight
I told him ‘no’
“NO” he didn’t want to hear
Reluctantly I gave in
Not allowing him to smell my fear
How dumb was I
One night of unprotected sex
Now I’m battling with decisions
Choices in which are leaving me perplexed
My heart screams in JOY
While my mind is yelling FEAR
I don’t know what to do
So in solitude I release a single tear
My heart tells me it’s a BABY I can love
A BEAUTIFUL gift given
From the One above
But my mind says
It’d be SELFISH to keep it
‘You can’t fill the baby’s every need…”
This is true, I admit
But then my heart retaliates
Holding tight to love and joy
I suddenly find myself confused
Should I keep or abort this girl or boy?!?

I want any kids of mine
To have a mommy AND daddy
I want them to know WITHOUT A DOUBT
They are LOVED and always will be
I want them to learn to smile
Before they learn to frown
I want them to know that it’s Ok
If in life they ever fall down

Right now where I live
In the environment that I’m in
I tell no lies when I say
That raising a child here would be a sin
I never thought I would be in this fight
Asking myself if I’m willing to take a life
But what kind of life would this baby truly live
If he or she were to  be surrounded by strife?!?
I refuse to let another kid
Be haunted by this place
The ghosts of my past
Will not even SEE their face!

There is a war going on
Can’t anyone see???
A battle between heart and mind
It is a war within me……

:-\

©Poe, 2013

© Poet4Life/Poe
(unless otherwise noted)

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